The talk was supposed to happen in April in front of a live audience, then COVID-19 happened. I re-wrote everything I wanted to say because nothing from before felt relevant. The world had changed. I had an additional six months to prepare – it didn’t matter. It didn’t make it easier. I don’t care what anyone says – preparing a 15 minute talk, memorizing it and having it be coherent and even a little inspirational is one of the hardest things to do.
I nearly called TEDx Montpellier Business School and told them I couldn’t do it. It was too hard. Too much pressure. I was going to fail. I was stuttering over my words every rehearsal. I was ashamed and too vulnerable to do it in front of people.
But once you watch the talk – you’ll see I had to go through with it in order to be the one to tell the story. This was the first TEDx talk to be recorded in France this year in this way – without a live audience, with the crew masked and directly to the camera.
Without a live audience made it easier, in some ways, (but in other ways is also harder to stare directly in the camera & have no reactions to vibe off). I could do it twice and they would take the best take.
It all came together two weeks ago (as these things do) with the help of SO MANY OTHERS. As much as I want to believe I can take this journey alone as a strong, independent woman, I can’t. No one can. We need each other. We are not an island.